Category: Poetry and Prose
-
I don’t like you better when you’re gone.
There’s a hole in the world that only I can see. I linger around it or lie around its edges just to be close to you and the memories still digging this hole inside of me.
-
Solitude on Mendota
Not many words escape The growing pressure That holds my lips Closed more and more The longer I stay here Silently wading into my own solitude, Waves Of numbness Crashing over me And as I’m baptized In the waters Of indifference That have tried to pull Me under since I could Crawl to their shores…
-
‘I should have brought you the ocean.’
No, there isn’t a missing “to” in that. I remember you telling me a story about going to stay in a hotel within driving distance of the ocean. You’d always wanted to see it, but the chance hadn’t come yet. Finally, you were right there. It was within reach. However, your friend wouldn’t let you…
-
Tired
I spent a lot of my life wondering about my place in this world. We all do, I think. Based on the concepts of my childhood, I dreamed of being a hero. Legitimately, there’s an old newspaper clipping of me dressed up as Batman just walking around. It was not Halloween. With that idea came…
-
The Gravity of the Unknown
I have always found a pull towards things that I do not recognize, Like a child first seeing the spark of a flame or light refracting in front of their eyes, Seeing the colors of the spectrum separated out from each other for the first time. And like them, I marvel at how more answers…
-
My biggest worry
I’ve never been afraid of dying alone. Even when I was a kid, I figured that’s how it would go. Something had happened. A thing I never talk about anymore. But I knew that after that point, I wasn’t going to be normal in any way. I wasn’t going to have that pleasant, little life…
-
Control
It’s when the rattle of life Like a car dragging a chain Strikes combustible thoughts In my brain That they ignite this fire Charring me deep into my soul And I know I’m a man on a wire About to lose control Sometimes it’s seconds, minutes Other times a day, maybe a week But the…
-
The scars tell the story.
I can’t remember the last time I was able to just breathe. I haven’t had a home in 5 years (that’s mine). My mental struggles make me feel like I’ve climbed Everest at least a dozen times. All to the enthusiastic cheers of crowds screaming out, “But you still need therapy.” And I’ve amassed so…
-
Eventually, those who come looking for me will find this.
If you’re looking for me because you want to ask me the same questions I hear every anniversary of the Kenosha protests, I hope you read this someday. For one, let me be clear, I don’t give a shit about fame. I didn’t like being known. Naturally, I’m an anxious introvert. Even picking up my…
-
To the last lover I was an *sshole to.
To the last lover I was an asshole to, you were right, and I was wrong. I wasn’t who I thought I was either. I could try to tell you about how I wish you’d met me when I was early-spring depressed, instead of start-of-winter depressed, and all of that. They’re just words now, though,…